The Muse

Defiant I stand, resolute and upright
I look in the mirror, eyes hardened to another day’s work.
Arms crossed, folded in resignation.
In despair my eyes only see the half that lies above the washbasin.

The other half, completes the picture
my body disconnected by thoughts.
Do I inspire those who choose to follow my form in
chalk, charcoal, pen, pencil or ink?
Do I want to inspire those who choose to follow my form in outlines
they deem fit for paper or canvass?
Do I need to inspire?

Yes, I do. My livelihood, my existence, my whole.
And so I lie, I stand
in stillness, the air checkered by the short breaths I utter,
the movements of sheets, the scratching of the artist portraying
me in life, lifeless yet full of vitality.

Do I sit how I want?
What pose suits my mood?
Does the artist choose the pose that suits my mood, as seen at length.

What thoughts do I have as I sit and wander, thoughts wandering
arms hanging, legs crossing?

Head forward, head lowered, eyes open, eyes closed.
Shoulders wrapped and draped, by fingers
falling carelessly, or held in position by the artist
whose eyes caress me from afar.

How much longer can I sit, this position that.
Staring into space. Please let me go …

Please release me from your frown, your needs are no greater than mine…

I beg, I implore, just cut the bonds
those invisible ties that pin me in this position.
Am I here for you, or me or for others to view?

So many questions – no answers
just let me sleep.
Let my body stop acting, stop lying in wait
muscles tensed, looking relaxed
just let me sleep.

Pulling tight on my arms I’m pulled from above
imprisoned, each day
as I sit and inspire.

As I sit I dream, free as the clouds
lifting and lilting and gliding in space
Forgetting that tomorrow, nothing will change
again I will sit, I will lie, I will stand
contorted as my master or mistress demands.

Modigliani and others

I painted one of these images several years ago and on researching the sensuous and colourful paintings of Modigliani’s women I was fascinated to find various versions of the same image.  I don’t know where they all come from but maybe someone can help me?

Kneeling low, her solid legs show

cherubic flesh.   The curved lines support and balance

her life.  Held high above her head.

Each arm and leg divide

to form soft balloon-like shapes.

Her torso reveals feminine curves which depict

a maturity beyond the years of her soulful and angelic face.

Eyes closed, nose defined and hair perfectly coiffed.

Who knows how heavy is that load she holds.

 

where curves and angles form a mass

She fell softly

suspended by the harshness of the rope.

 

The rope supported the rounded contours

of her body – a mass of flesh which in its closeness

became secure.

 

As her facial features were kneed by the pull of gravity,

so she surrendered.

 

Her fingers hung, not in sorrow, but in grace, her security encased

by her form captured in graphite.  The angles of her joints

became moulded in submission.  The curves of her muscles

consumed a tension

 

drained by the fragility of vertical and horizontal fibrous balances.

 

Come sit, and chat with Polly

Polly, beautiful Polly, went into hibernation last November and is only still awakening.  But she is going to make a big debut in 2012, and may have some new friends  tag along too. 

During these few months Polly went through many transformations,  and although I will put some of her emerging images on line, most of them are still incomplete.  I decided if I waited till they were finished, it would take years, and that’s not really the point of a blog .  Posting once a year is not the greatest way of communicating with the world.

When I was ‘paint’ shopping late last year I came across some black gesso and decided to prime my canvas with this instead of the white glossy gesso which everyone uses.  The whole black background changed my view of painting completely.  As with many Aboriginal paintings which have black backgrounds, it made me think back to nature, to earth, and where we come from.

Suddenly it was negative rather than positive shapes and forms  – which I have always loved and been fascinated by.  I had to outline Polly with white conti rather than charcoal.  It was a difficult task to choose what colours to use as my brain felt as if it were somersaulting – everything was opposite to what I was used to and had the opposite effects to what I was used to.  It was a little like painting with my non-dominant hand.   I was thinking of the outside-in, rather than the inside-out, and was definitely in non-comfort territory – and it was late at night and I was alone too. 

The black canvas initially was rather threatening but it soon became a source of peace and contentment as the colours of Polly took shape.  I had no control over how she was showing herself to the world!  She had me in the palm of her hand and was guiding my hand  in every breath she took.

I felt as if I were painting Polly from her inner thoughts, and some of the images, I hope, show some of those emotions.  I felt as if she was putting her flesh on the canvas and I was merely drawing the boundaries to keep her intact and to stop her from stepping out of the canvas to embrace me.  Her muscles were shaping her body as the colours covered the canvas.

Positive and/or negative definition?

Torquoise cushions for Polly to rest against. The background sets the stage for the foreground.

Polly relaxes as the props take shape around and behind her.

Coming together, getting together … Polly’s blue period!

As she sits today, but maybe not forever – the evolution continues – when to stop adding colour?

 

The results show the use of darkened shades of brighter colours (reds, oranges, torquoise, blue, green) with some of the black background showing through.  Both sets of paintings are of Polly seated on the same sofa.  In one, she is sitting comfortably with her right hand resting along the back of the sofa and her right leg bent comfortably, with her right foot under her left thigh.   You don’t need to see her face to know that she is at peace with the world and very relaxed in this position.  Say something to her…you’ll be surprised how talkative she is!